Most people don’t know this yet, but I’ve decided to give up computers and become a farmer instead. Since I’m the helpful type, I’ve decided to share everything I know about farming with you, starting with how I won my prize winning green beans.
These are just a few tips that I’ve learned over my last 25 minutes as a farmer.
Tips for Growing Prize-Winning Green Beans
The first step is to get yourself some dirt. The key thing to keep in mind is that your neighbor’s lawn probably has dirt in it, but you should look out for signs that tell you to keep off the grass, because that indicates that your neighbor’s grass doesn’t have the rich nutrients to grow prize-winning green beans.
Once you have the dirt, you can put your green bean seeds into it, and then you need to add some water and stir. You’ll want to remember to avoid using too much water, because mud puddles will get your shoes all dirty, and you don’t want to track that stuff in your server room.
During the gardening process, it’s important to have light. Be sure to avoid planting your green beans in a cave, because there might be bears in there.
After a lot of care and attention, your crops should be ready to harvest and take to the local fair.
If all goes well, you can get your own World’s Best Green Beans award!
Note: Award can also be created in Microsoft Word.
Programmer by day, geek by night, The Geek, also known as Lowell Heddings, spends all his free time bringing you fresh geekery on a daily basis. You can follow him on Google+ if you'd like.
- Published 04/1/09